Archive for July 2020
Can we Make Space to Repair Conflict?
In a world full of “I told you so” and worse, is it a wonder why people double down on their position, even if they may *want* to change their mind? Let’s face it, collectively we lean into shame and blame of ourselves and each other. If there are no clear pathways to course-correct—no…
Read MoreExploring your Victim Story
Victim. It’s a loaded word. Let’s talk about it from a broader perspective, because it is related to your life more than you may even know. In my work, there are two ways I talk about this word: Victimization and Victim Consciousness. Victimization is when we experience an act that is…
Read MoreFear vs. Danger: knowing the difference might save your life
Fear has a bad reputation. So, let’s get clear about something. As I see it, fear is not an inherently negative emotion. Fear, like all emotions, is simply a communication tool. It tells us that something does not feel okay. Fear seeks to protect us from a perceived danger. But, here’s the…
Read MoreThe Challenge of Misplaced Concerns
I want to talk about something that I think is very relevant to our current world. As young children, we are often confused about what is ACTUALLY going on around us—in our household and the world. In our desire for understanding, we assign meaning to what we are feeling. In other words, we…
Read MoreHow your Core Beliefs Impact your Perception of Masks
Since we are in the days of the coronavirus and wearing a mask has become a debatable activity, let’s talk mask usage from a trauma and behavioral perspective. First of all, let’s recall that emotion typically dictates our logic, and not the other way around. Emotion is based on perception and perception is…
Read MoreConsciously Unlearning Racism
This question came up in the “Dismantle Racism” group that I am currently facilitating, and I thought I would also share it here. We have been indoctrinated into a white supremacist system, so we have much to learn and unlearn. Q: What does it mean to me to “unlearn?” A: I believe…
Read MoreYour point is valid. It still causes harm.
Nowadays, we tend to take strong positions. And people are often seeking to point out who is RIGHT and who is WRONG, or who is causing more harm. But, consider this: an individual or a group can have valid points and still be causing harm to themselves and/or others. This is part of…
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